I just don’t get it. A man used to communicate face to face. In person. Whether it was with a weirdo, or a witness, a scumbag or a snitch. I’ve done my fair share of interviews over the years. I’ve engaged in verbal gymnastics, bending over backwards to control a conversation. I’ve mastered reading body language, eye movement, and sweating suspects. I’ve done it all. After all, I was trained by the best.

My old man taught me to take notes too. “One dull pencil is sharper than two dull minds” he used to say. By the age of 7, he already had me carrying my notepad and a pencil everywhere I went. Even at my age now, and with my, uh “experienced” memory, good notes equals no sweat. For years, that’s how I’ve done it. It’s talk, and take notes. Talk and take notes.

I look around now and see these crazy kids doing all kinds of weird stuff. I mean, in my time, a face-book, meant your mug shot was filed away: in the books downtown! No I don’t want to be your friend on face-book. Whatever that means! People ask me if I tweet. I am not a bird, and therefore refuse to tweet. I am a man! Crazy kids- I don’t even know what they are talking about.

Jane tried to explain to me the “social media boom”. How everyone is using it, even for growing business. I figured I’ve never needed it before, so why now.

But since I am on the case of helping you find new customers, I gotta ask: Does it work? Have you used this social media thing for your business? What do you think about it? Help a DT out.

It was a dark, muggy night. I tried to convince Jack that this operation wasn’t worth it- it was too dangerous. He (like usual) would have none of it. I was just glad he made it back alive.

After successfully producing the evidence he needed, Jack not only made it home safely, but also somehow, um, “acquired” a brand new WiFi iPad on his way home. We already use our iPad to help conduct our investigations, but Jack was talking about linking the two together. I don’t know, it was something about PadRacer. I just assumed it was another one of his crazy ideas.

Anyway, since we didn’t need the new one, I finally convinced Jack to give it away.

The good news is that because our main investigation is to find ways to improve your business, we decided to give it to you!

Now, what Jack had to go through to get the iPad is something I would never wish upon you, so I’m making it very simple. To return a favor we still owed to our friends at Cole Information, we just need you to either:

When you’re on either site, just post your answer to this question: “How has a Cole Information product impacted your business?”

That’s it! You will be entered. A random winner will be selected August 31st (and just between you and me, I have a feeling you might be the winner!). Then you can start using your new iPad as a powerful business tool, or just to show off to your friends.

It’s really easy to market to neighborhoods with a new product from Cole Information. I’ve been talking with Bryce over at Cole and he tells me they have a new website called inyourneighborhood.com. From what he tells me, this is unlike anything else out on the market today. Instead of using Zip codes or census tracts which no one, not even old Boot, can understand to select your mailing list, you pull up Google maps. Just draw around the neighborhood you want to market to and Cole gives you names, addresses and phone numbers of everyone in the neighborhood. How simple is that?

I explained to Bryce how these Blog things worked. He agreed to come on at share with everyone how this inyourneighborhood.com site works. Look for Bryce shortly and he’ll tell you more.

P.S. Be nice to him, he’s a new dad. If you ask, he may even share a picture of the youngest pilot in the family. He may even share a picture if you don’t ask!

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He turned the last corner only to see a “Going out of Business” sign in the front window.  Charging through the front door jack approached his old friend and owner of the diner, Mel.  “What the hell is going on, Mel?” Jack asked.Mel started off on a long winded story of how business was down because of the economy and people just weren’t coming in as often anymore.  Mel had even ran a radio ad a few months back but it didn’t bring in even one customer.  By now Jack was all fired up, “Mel, where’s my coffee?”  As Mel was pouring the coffee a couple of young girls came in the restaurant wearing what could only be described by Jack as pajamas.    Jack watched for the few seconds as the pajama clad girls ordered a huge spread of breakfast food.  When Mel finished taking the order he stopped back by allowing Jack to ask who these pajama girls were.  Mel said, “they’re regulars in here, just like you they live right here in the neighborhood”.  “Speaking of regulars, what does a guy have to do to get a refill of coffee here?”    Later that day, Jack just couldn’t get the idea out of his head that his favorite diner shouldn’t be closing.  After all, he’s Jack, Sales Detective.  There had to be something he could do.   Jack always did his best thinking when he and Boot would take walks around the neighborhood.  So he put Boot on the leash and off they went, but they didn’t get far.  As soon as they left the apartment, Betty next door stopped them and gave Boot a big pat on the head.  Betty just loved Boot, just like everyone else in the neighborhood.  Jack only took two more steps before he had the answer, THE NEIGHBORHOOD! That’s it.  The neighborhood is what would save Mel’s diner.  Jack wondered aloud why he hadn’t thought of it earlier, it was just the reason why radio advertising failed.  THE NEIGHBORHOOD!  Jack and Boot scrambled back up the stairs to the apartment poured a cup of coffee, black, and Jack started to formulate his plan…

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As near as detective Jack can figure it, the man who had introduced himself as Vincenzo Salvatore, Frank O’Connell, and Jim Smith had skittered away like a silverfish from the light with millions of dollars the minute the police got involved. Of course, the ever-subtle police department immediately pinched the neighborhood stoolie Floyd Wilmer, but even he didn’t know very much about Switzerland except that he’d heard whispers that he had fled back to San Francisco…

‘Well,’ thought Jack, ‘the Bay Area isn’t that big after all. Maybe I’ll go door-to-door…. Jack marinated on the problem while he punched in his command on the automatic coffee machine. The coffee machine whirred and hummed as rich b lack coffee filled the pot and the smell of it filled the room. Jack missed the old stovetop coffee, but his assistant, Jane Archer, insisted on the faster device.
While Jack was drinking his first cup, Jane tore into the office at top speed, as she usually did. Today, she was also speaking quickly and excitedly at her boss as she charged towards her desk in the corner with her laptop already on (Jack still didn’t quite understand how those things could be connected to the internet without a cable, but he didn’t question her methods).

Jack! Jack I’ve got it- I can’t believe I didn’t think of this sooner. Listen, I’ve found a way to find the ‘Frisco Fraudster, it’s so easy! Okay, so, he skipped town once it got too hot out here for him, right? Right? Well, if we could figure out everyone who’s bought a house in a given area recently, we can work from a smaller pool of suspects and bag Liechtenstein- didn’t you say he was rumored to be in San Fran’?
Oh yeah? Jack said.
In a good mood this morning, are you? Listen, do you know how a Cole Lists list works?

Jack didn’t move.

Go on.
It’s easy- I promise- just hear me out. With this list, we can figure out everyone in a given area who just bought a house, okay? And, we can search by location, how much the house is valued at, whether or not he has insurance and, with the bankroll he just ran off with, he’s going to be getting in contact with all kinds of insurance agents, contractors, and cable companies.

Sure, so, look, I don’t need to know how it works (hyperlink to video), but how long does it take to get this list? Won’t you have to mail away for it?

Are you kidding?! I found this out in 15 minutes! Look, there are about fifteen people who bought homes in his price range in the last two weeks, now, let’s eliminate all the ones who have families and- hey presto- four bachelors with stacks of cash who just paid down payments and they all have insurance.

Get me the names of the insurance agents; let’s see if they recognize a description…

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Wh-What is it exactly that you call yourself? Said Smith.

I don’t call myself anything. The name’s Jack Marrs, Sales Detective. He said. What seems to be the trouble?

Smith finished cleaning his lenses and settled the black-plastic rimmed lenses on the end of his nose. He cleared his throat and began to speak:

Well, sir, you know how things have been recently, what with the economy and the housing market being what it is and, well, one day my job’s a breeze and the next you can barely get anyone on the phone long enough to get a ‘No thank you’ out of them. Smith paused. I suppose I’m hoping for a better way to get new clients and expand my business opportunities. I mean, I’m part of a small insurance agency and my options are somewhat limited.

So you came to me, huh? What makes you think I’m the man for the job? Jack said.

The question caught Smith by surprise, and he fidgeted even more annoyingly before trying another sentence, but Jack cut him off immediately.

Calm down now, nothing to get worked up about. As it turns out, you’ve come to the right place. Sales leads and prospects is what I do. Which’ll it be, Mac?

Well, if you could suggest a way of finding customers without having to cold-call everyone so much, I’d be grateful. Smith said.

Jack asked Smith where he worked, and Smith wrote down the address of an agency in another part of town.

Okay, here’s what I’ll do for you, come back tomorrow and I’ll give you a list of prospects, only the best, only the most likely to take you up on whatever it is you’re peddling. Let’s say, three, sharpish. Sound good?

Smith stood up awkwardly and offered his hand to Jack. When Jack didn’t return it, he said his thank you’s and left, stumbling only once on his way out the door. After he left, Jack ditched the gum and poured himself a cup of stale coffee from a metal thermos and sat down at his desk. He pulled a grimy laptop out from the drawer, and tapped away at it tentatively. Detective Jack’s brow furrowed with apparent concern as he sipped his old coffee. At the sound of footsteps coming from the next room, he made an attempt to close the laptop, but the door opened as he was attempting to stuff it back into the drawer.

Aw, come on, old man. Are you still pretending you know how those things work? A woman asked. She raised an eyebrow at Jack and extended her arm in front of her, palm up.

Give me the computer Jack, and if you’re lucky I’ll show you how it works.

Hey now, Jane, you’re in early- I was just-

Sure, sure. Save it for the customers. Are you still scaring them with your hardboiled routine? Besides, you don’t even know how the database works, do you?

Okay, okay. It’s a little early in the morning for this, can you just get me a list of prospects for the poor guy. He left me the address of his agency… Jack said, as he passed Jane the laptop.

You didn’t even sign on the internet, you doofus. Here, okay… and… Jane’s finger flew across the keyboard and the mousepad, bringing up a series of windows until they arrived at webpage for Cole Information.

Alright, did you follow everything I just did?

Jack started to speak and was immediately cut off.

Great, you’re such a quick learner. Okay, now we can look for everyone in his area who bought a house recently, and that gives us…. three hundred names. You can click on the print button… that, one, yes, the one that looks like a printer.

Is it really this simple?

Sure is. Now you can go back to chewing on that gritty coffee you always make. Give me a shout if anyone else comes in and, Jack?

Yes Jane?

You forgot to turn the printer on. I’ll be in my office.

And with that, Jane departed as Jack searched for the ‘on’ button on his printer.